Thursday, June 28, 2012

Rain started Falling......

Rain started falling just before we boarded. The clouds had been moving around all morning as we spent most the day walking the streets of Mexico City. It was a nice feeling day, not too hot, not cold, just right. This was the last day of a week in the Heart of a culture and people that I fell completely in love with 10 years ago on my first visit to the real Mexico. I had been two years in recovery, trying to find a thread to living life different from the way I had lived for the last 20 years, and after reading a book by a Mexican Toltec Shaman something clicked in his words that felt like I had known what living by those words might feel like. It was an odd feeling, like you know something you don’t know, or you have it in you but can’t remember from where. The point was it hooked me and as Life works soon after I found where that same writer had teachers leading journeys to the Pyramids of Teotihuacan and that hooked me too so I got it together and booked that trip. My Heart exploded on that trip, it exploded into a million stars and fell back to Earth again where I knew if I followed the feelings my heart would come back together again whole and full of that starlight. Since that first journey I have really lived in continuous relationship with the great mystery and magic of those Pyramids and the Spirit people that live all through it’s many dimensions. Over these years my way of living and seeing life has shifted and transformed in ways I never knew existed. My life was saved by Grace, I once was lost but have been found, was blind but now I see. I never had any idea what the word Grace represented. As words represent the something they are referring to that is actually beyond the words translation. Our words are just for communicating; it’s up to us to live the experience they represent. Like the word Mexico could bring up visions and ideas, scenes from Movies and beliefs I had about what Mexico was or what Mexico must be like and none of that had anything at all to do with the real Mexico.It is a real shame we are so willing to accept our imaginary versions of life rather than having the courage to go find out for real. That is a very tragic sign of our times. These days we are so tempted to believe we know something about places and people, foreign lands and distant cultures, just because we see scenes on TV or we read books. Of course it’s great to read and watch TV but that is not real, its imaginary, virtual, a matrix. Now here I am 11 years after my first real experience in Mexico and I am as in Love and smitten with her magic and sweetness, struggle, sorrows and heart as I ever was. Like loving an amazing woman loving a Country like Mexico is very very much the same. Her heart is the heart of the Mother, Mother Mary, Tonantzin Aztec Virgin, her heart is expressed through the simple warmth of fresh tortillas and a the eyes of the children, the lines in the faces of the old ones and in the intention of Her Pyramids with their silent knowledge. My relationship with Mexico is a mirror for my relationship with all of life. As I have learned to live with her I have learned to live with myself. This life is a mystery. I am a mystery. Creation is a mystery. Maybe if we would treat life as a mystery we would find our humility and respect again. God knows we need to. The rain is falling harder now and this 737 is ready to take off into the clouds as hard as it can go. In three hours I’ll land in Los Angeles and the other love of my life, my wife Mee will pick me up and we’ll go have supper together. I love her name, so simple and true cuse it is all about Mee or me. I might leave Mexico but Mexico never leaves me just as I might leave my Mee but she never leaves me. I’ll bet before this 737 levels out we break through the clouds and find that Sun waiting on the other side. Yes it is all a mystery, in my heart this is all a mystery and these days I love this great mystery, I love the rains and the traffic, the openings and the endings. I don’t much love the meanness of humanity or the arrogance we have come to be so proud of but that too will bring it’s own response from this great mystery of life and at some point maybe we the people will wake up and stop living like fools. Who knows, deal is though, if I live long enough I do believe I’ll find out cuse the road we are on does not go on forever. Blessings to all of you out there under the evening Sun, may the Spirit that dwells in you call you out to see the mystery, it is a far greater calling than the ones we Humans have made up with all our words and knowledge. See you round…..

2 comments:

BubbaT said...

That about sums it up perfectly!

Carl said...

Yeah.....See you around, Lee.

Carl